


i want you real close to me (our lips fall so tenderly)

by swoonzi



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Seasons, i'm writing jigyu this time since soonhoon friendzoned each other at a fanmeeting, jihoon is an honours student, mingyu is tall and kind of ditzy, soonyoung junhui and wonwoo are minor characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-18
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-15 21:05:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7238470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swoonzi/pseuds/swoonzi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>winter brought empty skies and hushed whispers while spring bloomed cherry blossom blushes and secret kisses. summer brought heated lust that clung heavy with sweat as it brought along autumn; a sweetness allowing the story to further ensue under shared scarves, soft jazz, and falling leaves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. winter

**Author's Note:**

> title from this [song.](https://soundcloud.com/duendita/for-you-ft-ken-i-produce)

     winter was sudden and came with a kind of grace that wasn’t usually around during the season of tests and chalky classrooms filled with caffeinated students. winter meant empty skies with indoor after school activities that meant the school campus was going to be a little louder than it should be. winter irked people like lee jihoon who so fondly wished to be coddled in between the sheets of his dorm bed.  
   
     winter did not usually mean a new exchange students... especially handsome ones from anyang, a couple miles south of seoul. the student stood tall and had a puppy-like demeanor. looks that reminded jihoon of the large tree outside his house in busan that overlooked the coastlines of the city he knew as home. winter meant jihoon was stuck at his special place, a dark room in the corner of the third floor of the school. a studio that remained unknown to most students. winter brought new music that slipped out of jihoon’s earbuds who unknowingly plays his music at a high volume because he's constantly alone in this space. this time it's a soft japanese song called, “あいとわ,” that he didn’t exactly know the meaning of, but the soft piano lulled him a melancholic way that felt just right.  
   
     of all the years jihoon’s attended school in seoul, people have firmly held the idea that jihoon wasn’t one to be disturbed. he wasn’t an outcast, just secluded from doing other things that wasn’t entirely needed. you could ask junhui, the chinese exchange student that came to seoul years ago, soonyoung, a true optimistic dancer who understood jihoon’s passion to compose... just in a different sense; through movement, and wonwoo, a bit quiet, just the way jihoon liked them, with a real passion for old novels in hopes he’d be able to write his own one day.  
   
     “you see the new student? what’s his name?” soonyoung’s the first to speak with junhui and wonwoo quick to follow into the dimly lit studio. jihoon still has his earbuds intact to his head, but soonyoung’s never been a soft speaker, as everyone who came across him would know.  
   
     “mingyu. kim mingyu.” jihoon sighs, not looking away from the screen of bland beats leading up to be, in all, an uninteresting song. he doesn’t know why he's so caught up in it when it’s leading nowhere, but something keeps him glued to the screen in hopes that amidst the new music he seems to discover daily, a newfound inspiration would lead him to a smooth original beat.  
   
     “yeah! him!” soonyoung interrupts jihoon’s train of thought, “ he’s not that bad looking, if i do say so myself. not my type but you know… jihoon…” jihoon doesn’t know when it all began, but soonyoung has pestered with /any/ opportunity that was given to him to score jihoon a small date. “spice your life up! you need it!” he would always counter when jihoon would mention that soonyoung didn’t seem to have anyone special in his life either. a cupid who didn't seem to have the guts to take a shoot at himself.  
   
     “shut up, soonyoung. it's not happening.”  
   
     “hoonie…” soonyoung begins to whine and junhui excuses himself with wonwoo strolling behind cautiously, not intending to get caught up within soonyoung’s match-making frenzy's. jihoon fondles with the endless array of wires connected to various stereos and speakers hooked along the room and looks up at soonyoung, who’s eyes are glaring daggers at the smaller male. he quickly looks back at the computer screen; he’s never been good at eye-contact.  
   
     “soonyoung, you know, i might take on the offer if i aced that AP calc test… doubt it though..."  
   
     “bullshit, jihoon. you ace every test you receive.”  
   
     “who’s one to say i won’t ace this one?” and that ends the conversation.  
   
     much to his avail, he does ace that test and no one is surprised because it’s lee jihoon. he got into this school for a reason. he's invested into all these AP classes for a reason. however, newcomer kim mingyu’s eyes widen as if he’s just seen a ghost. as jihoon makes his way past the line of students to get back to his own desk, the taller male’s hand trails over the smaller's hand,  
   
     “hey, lee jihoon, right? you uh... look like you have your shit together…” he pulls up his own score, a 79. barely passed. “so… you taking up any offers for a study partner... or uh... offering to be a tutor?” his eyes scream desperately for assistance.  
   
     “are you going to pay me?” jihoon juts bluntly, peering up at the taller male and he’ll admit to soonyoung, the guy is kind of cute. an athletic leanness that would make anyone swoon, a face that would make anyone on the streets do a doubletake… mingyu raises an eyebrow,  
   
     “didn’t know asking other students for favours cost money, isn’t that a bit…” mingyu’s face falls for a brief moment, actually taking in jihoon’s words. not a clear understanding of sarcasm, jihoon notes.  
   
     “it was a joke, but aren’t you supposed to pay tutors?” the way mingyu’s face flushes makes jihoon’s stomach sink. “besides, you barely know me.” he mutters, the taller's tight grip on his hand starts to make him uncomfortable.  
   
     “it’s not for tutoring! i just… you see… soonyoung…” jihoon should’ve known.  
   
     “don’t listen to him. he's a ditz.”  
   
     “so, i’m taking that as a no?” mingyu grins sheepishly and jihoon wonders why mingyu hasn’t tried to end the conversation and walk away already. he wonder's if mingyu's heard the rumours about him, heard the whispers that he's just a cold and heartless music freak. jihoon purses his lips together anyway and mumbles, “no, it’s fine. i’ll study with you for a bit.” and tries to hide the blush crawling onto the tip of his ears. he's not used to talking to new people, nevertheless /cute/ new people and he can already hear soonyoung snickering from his side of the classroom with junhui and wonwoo.   
   
     “cool, exchange kakao id’s with me, it’s a date.” mingyu grins and lets his canines show, and jihoon lets the d word slip for now, in secret hopes that all will go well for them. call it a newfound interest.


	2. spring

     spring comes smooth, swiftly, and expecting. students shut themselves in the libraries in hopes that a double espresso is enough to find the strength to study for semester tests. jihoon and mingyu are no different... but they find the time to take breaks every once in a while.

     both jihoon and mingyu find themselves in the long abandoned choir classroom, mingyu perches himself onto the slick piano stool dusting off the baby grand in front of him. jihoon whispers something along the lines of,

     “i just don’t get it gyu, why people don't use this room. if i could, i would come all day long. the acoustics are great in here-”

     “you know, hoonie, maybe it's because girls these days are too worried about the way they dress than to be concerned about their voices... they could always use the everysing app hahaha and i guess guys uh... just don't want to be called gay?"

     “gyu, you know i’ve never cared about the stereotypes.” mingyu grinned, full of warmth and gratuity for the male in front of him. because he’s right, lee jihoon has never cared about that sort of stuff. jihoon was and is all about motive and talent.

     “yeah, i know. that's something i like about you the most.” he whispered.

     “hm?”

     “nothing, it’s nothing.” jihoon raises an eyebrow suspiciously but doesn't bother to speak up, just basks in the sun that barely engulfs the entire room. dust flutters like specks of gold in jihoon’s eyes.

     “so… you play?” jihoon points his eyes at mingyu pressing each piano key by key and his eyes crinkle at the sound of his voice echoing; great acoustics. the kind that make his voice seem larger than it really is, the kind that makes his voice boom over the entire room that gave him the strength he never seemed to find elsewhere in a crowd of people.

     “nope, never played in my life. my mom used to though; it was a really nice upright one" mingyu makes a rectangle shape with his long arms to mimic the shape of the piano, "she kept it right in front of the largest window and played in the sun. she grew some wildflowers on top of that thing, probably withered by now.” jihoon decides that he likes moments like these the best. the moments when mingyu talks about his home, his mother, anything that makes his voice go caramel smooth and full of promise.

     jihoon thinks of his own home, busan. he had a large grand he was so fond of before he came to the bustling city of seoul. he remembers the way his fingers glided around each black and white key as family members gathered around shouting,

     “play moonlight sonata!”  
  
     “no, arabesque!”

     “fantasie-impromptu op. 66 my boy.”

     jihoon loses track of where he is until mingyu is nudging his side, eyes a little concerned. he’s never seen jihoon so spaced out like that.

     “sorry, repeat that?” jihoon jolts.

     “i asked if you played?”

     “o-oh, yeah i do actually. took lessons back at home.” mingyu slides off the narrow chair, allowing jihoon to place himself in front of the piano, he basks in its dusty beauty.

     “give it a go.” but jihoon’s already on that. his fingers beg to be on the keys as they drawl out softly the beginning to debussy’s “clair de lune.” it’s as if jihoon has recovered from withdrawal and his hands shake ever so slightly at the cool touch and swift movements. he's missed this feeling.

     what’s so special about him is that he’s never been able to play a piece correctly. note by note, it was always impossible. he had to switch things up somehow. adding his own rests, extra notes, anything to make the piece seem more intricate, modern, exclusively his. sheet music is bullshit to people like lee jihoon, and he's moving onto the next piece, gymnopedie no. 1 by erik satie, a personal favourite. he’s swaying to the rhythm, becoming one with his own music. he’s alive.

  
     mingyu just glances fondly at the smaller male in front of him, seeming so alive, so large, so in awe. with all the time he’s spent with jihoon so far, this has gotten to be one where he has looked into his depth the most. most of the times, they're just studying. other times, they're softly arguing as mingyu tries to get jihoon out of his small studio on the third floor of the main school building. his heart is racing and every part of his mind, body, soul, is telling him to hold jihoon into his arms. he wants, wants, wants, so badly; but he refrains himself from interrupting the passionate male in front of him.

     mingyu thinks about it and clair de lune and gymnopedie no. 1 aren't even that difficult to play nd he really, honestly, doesn't know what it is, but they sound so different somehow. from the way jihoon pauses to only resume playing in a different key, a different tone, he's starstruck. he’s… he’s.. he’s in love.

     this time, his everything screams sirens into his mind, go for it, so he does. he slides himself next to the smaller male, their height difference every so prominent and he laughs. a real hearty laugh.

     “i always took you for the piano aesthetic type, you know.” jihoon furrows his brow in slight defense and wipes light sweat drops from his forehead.

     “what's that supposed to mean?”

     “nothing really.” mingyu’s still smiling, canines showing, jihoon loves that; his heart sinks. “but you know, the piano type. kind of serious, a little too alluring.” jihoon furrows his eyebrows further, trying to decipher what that could have meant, like a code because-

     but before he even realizes it, mingyu’s pulling in. oh god, oh god, oh god, hes pulling in further and the space between them is decreasing little by little and jihoon tilts his head to the side without realizing and mingyu smells like the countryside, warm and full of people, places, animals, anything because knowing mingyu, he’d just want to surround himself with absolutely everything. before jihoon could further think about the every so decreasing space, they're kissing.

     lip on lip, jihoon tastes something peachy and he glances slightly at the window on the side of the classroom; it’s spring. there are cherry blossoms blooming from the court, and that’s how spring comes and goes for the both of them.

     mingyu grasping jihoon’s wrist and peppering light kisses on his lips as jihoon clings onto the larger’s uniform top, clinging to him and hoping that he wouldn't let go of his beet red self. spring ends in newfound love that blossoms more furiously than the flowers that ache to sprout.


	3. summer

     summer danced into place like a long-awaited interlude in between the countless sleepless nights that students endured with prayers and midnight expressos. it meant dolling up and partying without a care. getting jobs and flexing your wages on snapchat.

     jihoon was a fan for neither. just allowed himself permission into the school to burrow himself back into the abyss of empty ramen cups and energy drinks; the studio. of course, he brings along another target who kind of looks like a large puppy. mingyu sips on a fruity drink while bopping his head to the piano melody that slips out of jihoon’s headphones.

     “gyu, you’re a fucking genius! a genius i tell you!” he imploded, wide-eyed full of passion and mingyu swore he saw quarter notes dance in the other's eyes.

     “i didn’t do anything jihoon, the genius is you.” mingyu would smile, canines showing getting the impression that jihoon preferred him smiling with them poking out. he's learned and become a quieter supporter around his cute boyfriend and jihoon would flush red because he’s never been the “accepting towards compliment” type in his opinion, and it gave mingyu an even greater reason to lean right back and kiss the other breathless.

     jihoon’s not a people person and most everyone would agree, himself included. mingyu doesn’t even know how he’s managed to talk to the other without getting kicked out of the small studio.

     “jihoon, it’s summer.” he twiddled his thumbs and his voice is pleading.

     “i know, gyu. we’re the only ones in the building.” he snorts.

     “soonyoung told me to ask you so don’t blow your ass on me but you know… you should get out more. soonyoung’s tonight, a party.” and this is what mingyu didn’t expect, god he almost shit his pants.

     “okay, i guess. what time?” the smaller of the two didn’t look away from the black and white keys and fumbled with the settings.

     “wait, you’re gonna go?” mingyu raises an eyebrow and unsucks his stomach.

     “do you not want me to?” jihoon gives him a perplexed look and a low laugh.

     “no, fuck, just didn’t expect you to say yes... shit. woah.” jihoon rolls his eyes, it's not the end of the world but it's a first for him too. agreeing so easily to an environment he's sure to get uncomfortable in.

     “just tonight, gyu. don’t get your hopes up. soonyoung’s been bothering me about this one. he bought the good alcohol.” jihoon snickers in excitement.

     “guess i’m picking you up at eight? we can go together?”

     “wouldn’t want it any other way.” and god, mingyu’s heart just barely made it out of his chest. he's so in love with this man and seeing him come out of his comfort zone right in front of his eyes makes him so proud, so happy, so so so happy.

     if mingyu had known party jihoon would've been geared up in a white tee, tight fitting black jeans, and a fashionable bomber jacket to top it all off… he would’ve never agreed to letting his baby go. mingyu's the clingy type and he's well aware of jihoon’s fair looks and this was just unfair. sweat lightly layered the smaller's face and under the dimly lit street lights, it looked like his face was flecked in gold. jihoon would say the same for the taller male. he’s only seen him in either a school uniform or lazy date etiquette that still got him stares from schoolgirls passing them by on the street. he wants to kiss him so badly, slowly succumbing his urge to tippy toe, kiss the taller leaving him with nothing but a heavy gasp, and snarl, ‘mine.’

     hand in hand, the two enter their dancer friend's house filled with tossed solo cups and a song with a bass that went so hard that it made jihoon’s head ring.

     “mingyu, jihoonie! you actually came! ahhhaaha you wanna suck faces right now?” soonyoung peered from behind the kitchen entryway with a soju and beer concoction for the both of them. he was shit-faced no doubt, but jihoon always got a good laugh from these moments knowing that soonyoung would wake up with a heavy hangover and jihoon would have all the black-mail videos to make matters worse.

     “yeah, thanks for the drinks.” mingyu gave soonyoung a light fist bump and the dancer gave him a sloppy wink already grabbing the arm of a familiar chinese male.

     “no problem! and jun, ya can’t just like, ya know. leave me like that. ooooohhhh wait, you got a boyyffrriieennddtoooo hahah!!!” he yells abnoxiously and jihoon’s eyes widen and he looks aside uncomfortably. mingyu peers down at the smaller and gives him a reassuring squeeze.

     “wait, junhui… you have a boyfriend?” jihoon squirms in his place and junhui nods while calling for a male blended within the dense crowd and a petit looking boy, still tall, wraps his arms around junhui’s stomach.

     “wennie!” the male cries in delight and it’s the first jihoon’s seen junhui look at someone or something with so much interest in the couple years he’s known him.

     “ming, meet my friends. you know soonyoung the host of the party. the tall one is mingyu, and the smaller is jihoon.” jihoon lets the mention of him being small slide as he turns his attention to the boyfriend. he's definitly goodlooking, jihoon's so shocked.

     “hi, yeah i’ve heard about you all. jihoon’s music is probably the best i’ve ever listened to. hyung you’re so amazing!” jihoon flushes as usual with the compliment. ‘ming’s’ korean isn’t the best, it’s obvious he’s a foreigner, but he's still good.

     “thanks, uh...”

     “just call me minghao, hyung.”

     “yeah, thanks minghao. how long have you two been dating?” jihoon lets himself breathe. he’s a nice kid, junhui got himself a nice one.

     “mmm, couple months? i only just moved here close to a year ago.” he claps his hands and changes the topic, “mhm, anyways, i have a shop close by. ever been to that cafe with all the chinese text written all over?” jihoon knows exactly what he’s talking about. he goes by with mingyu every once in awhile for a coffee/study date and to enjoy some good jazz music.

     “yeah, i’ve been. you're the one who owns it?” jihoon’s eyes crinkle in surprise; he's so young too! mingyu lays his head on top of jihoon’s head, giving it a peck.

     “yeah! if you ever stop by, please go ahead and play!” minghao urged while smiling and jihoon understands why junhui took an interest in him so much. with more light chit chat, the group part ways which leaves both mingyu and jihoon adaze.

     “well... we’re here you look good as hell… wanna dance some soju off?” and dance they do. they shake out their systems until jihoon leans in closer to bask in the taller’s body holding jihoon right back. mingyu adds another scene in his head with moments he loves most. god, jihoon looks so vulnerable like this. buzzed from shots and crowd adrenaline and when he peeks up at mingyu, his eyes crinkle and his dimples pop from a smile so wide, mingyu wonders how he got so lucky.

     jihoon on the other hand looks up at his mingyu with a whole new awe. his hair is slicked back with gel and the fluorescent lights bounce off his rapturous gaze, mingyu’s eyes are another reminder of home. the busan shores that lit up so brightly jihoon had to squint when he stepped his toes inside the sandy waters. his eyes are the glint of the diamond bridge jihoon would peer at from the window of his home. the bridge that held fireworks above it that he adored as a child. oh god, mingyu is so beautiful and jihoon wonders how he got so lucky.

     mingyu caresses jihoon’s cheek and leans forward to his ear,

     “wanna leave now, love?” and the pet name makes jihoon giggle even if he’s used to it. jihoon just grasps mingyu’s left hand tightly and leads him out of the door of soonyoung's and back into the night where fireflies roam and rule the dark abyss of seoul. they’re heading home, mingyu’s dorm to be exact, knowing his roommate wouldn’t be present. they both know what’s in store for them behind closed doors. clothes stripped as soon as they enter the apartment, they kiss as if every one may be their last and they roam each other’s bodies as if they’ve discovered eutopia. they share their love so deep and moan their names like a religious mantra. lust consumes them both and they just work with it. stroking each other’s hair like it’s the most luxurious fur coat, and kissing each other ‘til they’re both flushed vermillion.

     aftercare is simple yet caring and they both lie next to each other, in awe of one another’s presence on the small bed. jihoon notices a replica of ‘sunflowers’ by vincent van gogh and he can’t help but stare in melancholy.

     “hey gyu, i didn't know that you liked art?” he asks with simple curiousity.

     “oh that? no, mom gave it to me when i moved in. sunflowers grow big where i grew up.”

     “oh. want to know something?”

     “of course, love.” jihoon feels his heart swell lightly.

     “did you know people say that vincent van gogh, the person who painted the original of that painting, used to eat yellow paint because he believed that if he ate it, he’d become a happier person.” mingyu brings jihoon closer and peppers him with small kisses.

     “would you- would you do something like that?” mingyu peers at jihoon and jihoon just cuddles closer to the taller.

     “hm? what do you mean by that?” he whispers now.

     “you know, do something so foolishly absurd… to be happy?” and jihoon freezes because god what he wants to say; no, what he wants to yell is, ‘yes! that’s why i have you! god, me loving you is so absurd and so hard to decipher why it happened but god, everything is so right now and i’m so so so in love with you. you make up for what little happiness i have in my life.’ but instead he just shakes his head.

     “no, because you know what? i think i’m good just where i am now.” and that’s how summer ends and slowly dissipates away. lust creeps it’s way in and bears new fruit within the two lovers that holds it’s place and keeps them both safe.


	4. autumn

     autumn caresses everyone’s cheek tenderly, leaving most at a rather gentle and sentimental state of mind. love blooms all over the school campus and disperses throughout the densely crowded streets of seoul city. a new semester of classes start out light and easy to student’s great pleasure, leaving a lot of leisurely time for them to go about (and be reckless for some time longer). jihoon on the other hand, tries to steady himself going back in forth between “study” dates with mingyu and concluding the track he’s been working himself to the bone on.

     when club activities are over for the day, jihoon makes his way out of the campus and passes by the dance studio where soonyoung is freestyling to a jazzy beat. go figure, jazz is for th romanticists. jihoon just drops a water bottle bought from a nearby vending machine by the door where soonyoung is sure to see it later. yeah. he's kind of an asshole to him but jihoon takes care of them in secret. he's a quiet giver.

     by the locker rooms near the entrance of the main campus building, jihoon hears soft murmuring in another language. minghao’s feathery hair peeks from the edge of the lockers and junhui peers down at his lover and they’re cheeks flush apple red. by themselves, the two seem incompatible. junhui, a quiet student that follows along to whatever soonyoung tells him to do; an actor’s aura that gives himself a suave first impression, and minghao. his figure is lanky and he holds only pure intentions. they stare at each other just like that before leaning into a light kiss. jihoon holds his breath. he stares in awe at the two lovers and scurries out of the building to find his own mingyu standing a few feet away. mingyu holds his arms out and jihoon doesn’t hesitate to sink into them and devour the safeness only mingyu could provide. he craves a love so deep.

     mingyu likes it best when jihoon is like this, clutched tight to his own body, affection leaking and smothering them both with comfortable heat that sheaths them from chilly autumn weather. however, he gets the most unsettled at this sort jihoon as well. jihoon prides in veiling himself well. he likes to build walls around himself even if he knows it's unhealthy to keep all his problems to himself. for the lack of affection he gives, he’ll reconcile through poems, mellow songs, and soft sweet words of sweet nothings when he thinks no one else is there to hear. with little moments like these, when jihoon accepts himself to be delicate within the hands of his lover, mingyu worries for jihoon’s mind, his health, his all; but softens his touch and abides in what little time the moment will last, kissing the tips of jihoon’s ear as it flushes rosey pink. both tighten their embrace onto one another.

     hand in hand, jihoon and mingyu make their way across the closely compacted street shops before pausing before only one. a familiar foreign shop indicates their arrival at xu minghao’s cafe he so curtly mentioned was under his ownership at soonyoung’s party. jihoon shifts a bit uncomfortably, unsure on who would be inside and feeling a little violated at his previous encounter with the couple; though they wouldn't have known.

     “you okay, hoonie? it’s a little cold, want my other jacket?” mingyu begins to peel his bomber jacket but jihoon pushes it back on and urges for him to keep it.

     “not cold, gyu. you're the one that gets cold easily,” jihoon snickers and mingyu just shrugs before wrapping his scarf around the smaller's neck and opens the door to face the comforting smell of petite cakes and freshly made egg tarts. jihoon wonders how a college student manages to keep a place like this looking so clean and orderly.

     “they have bubble tea, hoonie… i’m guessing you want strawberry or melon?” and jihoon chooses strawberry today. it’s something only mingyu would know. that instead of something bitter that everyone would guess him to be the type to get, ihoon has a sweet tooth and hated the taste of coffee without milk and sugar. hated the taste of tea without milk and honey. hated the taste of strawberries or blueberries without it being lathered in sugar beforehand. mingyu nodded and headed towards the counter and left jihoon to dawdle towards a table for two, keeping his ears open for a rendition of “star crossed lovers” by the “claude williamson trio” being played by the cafe performers. mingyu heads towards the window seated table and jihoon gratefully takes his strawberry bubble tea and sips on it with delight. mingyu sips his own taro flavoured bubble tea and glances at his smaller lover rocking to the beat of the jazzy tune.

     minghao steps in front of their table without notice and startles the both of them. junhui at the counter, talks to a lady in fluent cantonese while looking at jihoon and grins. it’s like a sweet domestic business for the two of them and jihoon grins back and mingyu gives him a wave.

     “jihoon hyung! you came when i was here! mingyu hyung, you too!” minghao’s face beams. he loves other bright people and people throughout the cafe welcome minghao with extended hands and greetings neither jihoon and mingyu can understand. minghao throws an apologetic glance to the both of them as he tends to a few people before getting back to them.

     “minghao, how do you even tend to this place when you’re still a student? i can't even eat a proper meal on my own without this,” jihoon glares at his lover, “reminding me to.” minghao laughs before sitting himself down beside the two lovers.

     “i have to! but the duty aside, i have help. junhui offers to take the counter job and a few chinese neighbors of mine don’t mind looking after the shop when i have classes in exchange for some bread and egg tarts! sounds like a fair deal if you ask me… and speaking of a deal, jihoon hyung! you said the next time i saw you, you'd play a little something! you will, won’t you?” and jihoon curses himself saying such meaningless things he had no intention of actually doing... but he's always been a sucker for puppy-like people (cue mingyu) so he has to agree. he looks at mingyu for support but knowing him, mingyu would only urge him to play in hopes of hearing him play piano again.

     “i-i um, did i ever say that?” jihoon stalls and sweat layers his hands and his breathing is irregular. call it stage fright. minghao raises an eyebrow and pats his senior on his shoulders.

     “of course you did hyung! and knowing this song, it’s about to end real soon. you could go next!” minghao keeps pushing on jihoon and mingyu slides next to his lover and slings an arm around him, consoling his quivering hands.

     “hoonie, you could just try. love, it’s not a big crowd, you play great.” jihoon nods as the last note of “star crossed lovers” slides off the pianist’s fingertips and with a curt bow, he steps off stage. jihoon prods towards the baby grand perched in the center of the cafe and extends his fingers across the keys. he feels for familiarity and he thinks of home. in busan, after school activities would end, jihoon would make his way towards the small apartment he shared with his mother while his father stayed off 'til after hours working.

     “jihoon, you could play this for me, can’t you?” his mother would motion towards a stack of newly printed piano sheets she gathered from the internet. jihoon would nod and take his place at the piano, imagining himself sitting towards a crowd of rich and beautiful men and women in carnegie hall. he was an ambitious one as his fingers moved across the keys and sought more, better, only the best for his mother who would nod her head back and forth to the sounds of “melodies op. 3” by “rubinstein” and would open the windows as he played “impromptu in g flat, d 899” by “schubert” for the whole oceanside to hear.

     from the sides of the cafe, junhui and minghao give jihoon another thumbs up. mingyu, still sat at their shared table, knows that he’ll be okay. he thinks of the moment in the choir room where jihoon’s hair glowed underneath the soft sunlight that barely peaked through frosted clouds. jihoon’s hands grazed through the keys and switched up the rhythm with ease and made the song his. the way their lips met at the end of “gynopedie no. 1” and their hands intertwined, preventing jihoon to play any further. their first kiss tasted of renewal and epiphany.

     jihoon pushes busan aside and thinks of nights with mingyu after exams. they had no need to be together besides studying at the time. they had no labels on what they both were to each other and were fine with teetering through what they felt. when he looks back at it, it might’ve slipped somewhere within the nights they buzzed themselves with sips of cheap soju. beside each other on mingyu’s couch, he might’ve slipped it without mingyu hearing a soft, “i think i love you.” being cold and lights turned off, mingyu looked so mesmerizing, even for jihoon. mingyu was so tan and brooding, and oh god, jihoon loved that sun-kissed skin. 

     jihoon starts his light with "mormorii della foresta" by “liszt” and finds himself wanting more. his fingers stray to find more notes and once again, the song becomes his. junhui leans into his boyfriend, whispering a soft, ‘i told you so,’ as minghao, bewildered by jihoon’s talent, nods curtly.

     “yeah, he’s amazing.”

     mingyu gleamed at his lover and watched his show roll out. people seated at the small tables drinking their lattes and studying for their classes paused to watch the man unravel his piece; giving him praises in both korean and chinese. jihoon gazed at mingyu before resting his hands and autumn ended like that. both jihoon and mingyu ready to go hand in hand back towards one of their apartments through the streets filled with both ephemeral and lingering ambitions all unlike their own. love swims throughout them both and they zip their lips in the middle of the streets as if the mixed commotion was their own ineffable sonnet.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry the updates were so spread out. to be honest, this fic started at the wrong time and was totally unplanned. i didn't really know how to keep it going. thanks for sticking around!


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